Music Inspired Drabbles
by LucyNyy
Summary: I figured I should have a dumping ground for my ZoSan drabbles. These will be different one-shots, or stories I've started but never been able to finish. And also there will be angst, a lot of angst... The rating will be everything from K to T (Maybe M later)
1. Stay - Mayday Parade

Music drabble:

ZoSan fiction K+

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own One Piece or any of its characters or locations; they all belong to the wonderful Eiichiro Oda. I do not earn any money on this story nor do I want to. I simply write for the fun of it.**

_Song: _**Stay** by **Mayday Parade**

Sanji was sitting by the kitchen table; he had already downed a whole bottle of his cheapest wine, and was going on his second. Now he was clutching a cigarette like it was a life line. He had royally fucked up. Zoro didn't want to talk to him anymore and he didn't know what to do.

How had it even come to this? They were nakama, shouldn't that be enough?

Their friendship had always been intense and passionate, but never on the level Sanji was feeling it now. He hadn't meant for it to end this way, or rather, he hadn't meant to do what he did. But it had felt so fucking right damn-it, he couldn't deny that.

They had been sparring in Zoro's dojo in the crow's-nest late one evening; it was the only time they were actually able to talk to each other like civilized people. Not throwing banters at each other like they always did throughout the day. Sanji lived for those evenings, because that was when Zoro shed his hardened shell and opened up. It had taken them some months to come to the level where they could talk freely about everything, and laugh together. Well for Sanji it had meant being open about most things; there were certain thing he hadn't planned on telling Zoro. Until he had been an idiot and let his emotions cloud his senses that it.

He clutched his hair; he was such a fucking idiot!

One minute they had been sparring like normal, but then they had gone head to head, and Sanji couldn't stop himself in time. He had leaned in and kissed him. He felt disgusted by his own lack of control, he had managed so well the last couple of months to keep himself in check, and then for some reason all his willpower had left him, and he had given into his emotions. But that kiss, it had left him floating and all warm inside, how could Zoro not have felt that?

Zoro had of course thrown him across the room, glared at him with a slight perplex stare and then hurried down the hatch. He had been left sitting on the floor with his jumbled thoughts and emotions, and when reality had hit him, all he had wanted to do was die. But he had managed to get himself up of the floor and hurried after Zoro, he had needed to explain, needed the man to understand that it would never happen again, but Zoro had screamed at him to leave him alone and to never speak to him again. It had hurt much more than he had ever imagined. It was like Zoro had just ripped his heart out, stabbed it and then stomped on it for good measure.

The door into the galley was slowly opened and Sanji was about to scream at what was probably Luffy coming to sneak a night snack, but as he snapped his head around his eyes widened. "Zoro…"

Zoro looked at him apprehensively, "cook… why aren't you in bed?" He didn't move from the doorway, and it looked like he was debating leaving or not.

"I can leave if you like..." Sanji looked down on the table, he wanted to apologize, wanted to explain, but he was so afraid Zoro might just storm of again if he tried. His hands were shaking as well, but he put it down as his body reacting to him being overly sleep deprived, and that there was no way it was because he was afraid or ashamed of being in Zoro's presence.

"No, just stay, I was just coming for a bottle of sake..." He walked calmly across the floor and over the liquor cabinet and got himself a bottle of cheap sake. Sanji was having trouble lighting his cigarette, his hands were trembling so fucking much. "Um cook? Are, are you drunk?" Zoro looked at him concerned, a look the swordsman rarely used, and which he had only seen him direct at him once since he joined the crew. It made the pain in his chest even harder to bear. "I'm fine marimo, now get out, please?" He pleaded for Zoro to leave him before he broke completely down, something he had never done before and he hated himself even more for seeming weak in front of him. But Zoro was not one to follow pleadings, and he took a seat on the opposite side of the table instead. Sanji was on the verge of tears now. "Zoro, please leave"

"What do you want from me Sanji?" Zoro asked him calmly, with the same voice he had used when Sanji had told him about his childhood. Sanji raised his head, tears had started filling in the corners of his eyes. "Huh?" It was all he managed to choke out.

Zoro nursed his bottle and took a good gulp from the bottle, "I asked you what you want from me? What do you want me to do?" He looked at Sanji with total honesty, but Sanji was so lost in his emotions that he had trouble understanding what Zoro was talking about.

"I... I don't want anything..." He didn't know what he should answer or if he should answer at all. What was Zoro trying to say with this? Was he trying to understand, or was he meeting Sanji half-way? Just what the flying fuck was Zoro saying.

"Bullshit! If you don't want me to do anything, you wouldn't be here drowning yourself in cheap wine and going on you forth night without sleep." Zoro slammed the bottle on the table and looked Sanji square in the eye. "So tell me what the fuck you want me to do in all of this, cause I am not willing to stand on the sideline looking at you killing yourself."

"You think it's because of you I'm like this? Fuck you marimo, you have nothing to do with any of this." Sanji sneered back at him, it was partly true anyways, and most of his problems were because he hated himself for what he **himself** had done, not because of what Zoro hadn't done.

"Then at least tell me what it is, so I can help you!" Zoro leaned forward resting his elbows on the table, lacing his fingers together and resting his head on them, still looking at Sanji.

Sanji looked down at the table again, feeling defeated and vulnerable, "I thought you told me to stay the hell away from you and to never talk to you again..."

Realization hit Zoro like a spade in the face, "Oh man Sanji, I'm so sorry, I overreacted, I didn't mean..." He let a hand run through his head, and Sanji couldn't help following the motion with his eye. "I panicked ok, I acted on instinct, I'm so sorry..." He trailed off, and Sanji could see he was struggling with what to say.

"So... so you don't hate me?" Sanji asked with a small voice, his eyes had again dropped to the table, unable to look at Zoro. "No Sanji, I don't hate you, I could never hate you, no matter how much of an idiot cook you are at times." Zoro smiled at him, that gentle smile that simultaneously broke and melted Sanji's heart.

"W-Will you stay with me tonight?" Sanji managed to mutter out, lower now than before, it was just above a whisper. Zoro reached out and laid his hand over Sanji's trembling ones. "Of course, I'll stay as long as you want me to." He whispered back.

Zoro moved over to Sanji's side of the table, and they stayed silent for the rest of the night, they didn't need words anymore. Sanji was getting sleepier by the moment as well, and he was blaming it on the wine like he always did. He was slumped over the table, his mind in an alcohol induced haze, and just before he fell into the darkness he thought he felt a hand stroking through his hear and a muttered,

"I love you".


	2. Shattered - Trading Yesterday

Rating: T

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own One Piece or any of its characters or locations; they all belong to the wonderful Eiichiro Oda. I do not earn any money on this story nor do I want to. I simply write for the fun of it.**

* * *

Song:

**Shattered** by **Trading Yesterday**

He had tried everything to suppress those damn feelings, for nearly three years had he tried covering them up. So why was he sitting there on a rock all alone feeling more broken than ever. He knew seeing the cook again after their two year separation would be painful, painful because memories of that damn cook was the main thing that had helped him keep sane through his training with Mihawk. Just little things, such as the adorable smile he always had when he was around the ladies (oh how many times he had wished that smile to be directed at him), the way he smoked his first cigarette in the morning because he would look so peaceful and sexy while doing so, the way he moved when he was in the kitchen, and his favourite night time memory was definitely from when they were in Arabasta bathing in the palace. He had had the most perfect view of the cook's body, mind you it had been extremely hard suppressing certain urges back then, but the memories had been etched into his brain from then on. Of course they had become more and more vivid for each time, sometimes just imagining Sanji's hands on him was enough, other times he would fantasise about going all the way never caring who was top and who was bottom. He wouldn't care either way if he could just have one night with the blond.

Just thinking about it made him want to curl up and cry, but damn-it he was Roronoa Zoro for Kamis sake, and he didn't cry.

He was glad that he had gotten himself lost this time; he really couldn't face Sanji or any of the others on the crew for that matter right now. He just needed some time for himself where he could be free to sulk and feel miserable without having the crew around him trying to figure out what was wrong. And the truth was there was nothing wrong, not really, everything was exactly how they were two years ago. Except maybe for the thing about him getting undeniably drunk at a bar which ended up with him pouring out about his fucked up love life to the lovely bartender, and how miserable it was to never have that love returned to you. It wasn't until after he was finished with his rant that he realized Sanji stood in the doorway having heard the whole fucking thing and glaring at him with a disgusted look that only screamed "_Stay away from me you disgusting freak_". He felt so stupid, how the hell could he blurt it out like that, could he have been more of an idiot, seriously. He really wanted to just stab himself in the heart with Wado at that point, anything would be better than having that disgusted look on Sanji's face directed at him.

He knew Sanji wouldn't back down with that glare, but he really didn't want to meet the cook's eyes anymore and so he resorted to doing something he never thought he would do; he pleaded with his eyes for Sanji to leave. He hated that he was so drunk that he would resort to actually looking defeated, but it couldn't be helped, his heart felt ripped apart and all he wanted to do was to disappear from his spot, but he couldn't do anything before Sanji left. It seemed to have worked though because the disgusted glare on the cooks face turned livid with rage and he turned on his heel and left faster than Zoro ever thought was possible.

Alone in the bar again Zoro paid his tab and left, not really registering what he was doing or where he was going, not that it mattered really, he needed to get away from that place and to a place where he could be alone. How he managed to find this secluded place he wasn't sure, but it reminded him about some of the places on the island he grew up, like the place where he went after Kuina died. It felt like that, like a part of him had died. He had sat down, tucked his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, resting his head on his knees, one by one tears started to run down his cheeks and he didn't try to stop them this time, he didn't even have the energy to wipe them away now.

As the images of Sanji's face swam in front of him, the unspoken words between them were as clear as if Sanji had shouted them to him. There was absolutely no chance in hell that anything would ever happen between them. Of course he had known it all the time, ever since he first laid eyes on the blond way back when he was still working on the Baratie; Sanji was as straight as an arrow. Even the chance of them ever being friends was a long shot; they were nakama yes, but friends, highly unlikely. They were rivals and occasional sparing partners, nothing more and now even that bond seemed to have been broken.

If it weren't for his promise to Kuina he would have cut his heart out at this moment. Yes, he knew he had feelings for the cook, feelings that had gradually built up from occasional lust and desire for the other teen to deeper and stronger feelings, but that it would hurt this bad to actually be rejected, he had no idea. He had for so long tried to forget his feelings, to suppress them, bury them deep in his mind so that he could move on, but he couldn't. Not even when he was at Kurigana where he had on occasions indulged in nightly activities with the elder swordsman, could he stop thinking about the blond. He had been tactful not to mention the blond for the elder man though, mostly in fear that it would be used against him, or in fear that the swordsman would refuse to train him if he knew Zoro wasn't completely focused on the training. And then there was that moment at Sabaondy when he had seen Sanji for the first time after two long years, when he surfaced from boarding the wrong ship, he had wanted to smile like a little child, but had managed to keep a straight face during the rest of the day. When they got back to the Sunny however he had hurried to the bathroom to take care of some business that he had been losing more and more control over for the past hours. He had cursed under his breath about the steadily increasing problem of Sanji becoming sexier for each time he saw him. He had been so angry at the cook for that, not that it had been a good excuse to be mad at him, but an excuse non-the-less, and it would work for a while to keep his mind occupied with being angry at Sanji opposed to suddenly losing control around the cook and do something he would later regret. Like now for example, where the blond knew, he knew and he hated Zoro for it.

~oOoOoOo~


End file.
